The pain we go through for love
by MsRawkeye
Summary: They always seem to be at each other's throats, but the fact is... Aurora loves Severus and... Severus loves Aurora.  But are they really ready to admit it to each other? Pls review!
1. Chapter 1

The pain we go through for love.

Chapter One

She had witnessed, not for the first time, his cruel  
>treatment of a student which she could not condone.<p>

Upon entering his classroom earlier, she had knocked on his  
>door, but Severus Snape had not heard her over his own shouting voice, she had<br>seen poor Neville Longbottom cowering before the very irate Potions Master.  
>Coughing loudly she caught Snape's attention. She calmly asked him to lower his<br>voice and explain himself, stressing that this was not the correct manner in  
>which to educate a student. Snape saw this as a personal attack on his teaching<br>ability and turned his anger towards her, sending a volley of insults her way.  
>The students gasped in shock and when the bell rang, Harry Potter, Hermione<br>Granger and Ron Weasley lingered in the doorway, concerned for their Astronomy  
>Professor's safety.<p>

"It's ok. The three of you head on to your next lesson.  
>Don't worry yourselves with what just happened."<p>

She ushered them out, Harry Potter mouthing the words, "Will  
>you be ok?" She nodded to him and closed the door with a soft click.<p>

She turned to face Snape, trying to control her urge to take  
>out her wand and hex him.<p>

"How dare you speak to me in front of a student like that  
>Severus! That is unacceptable behaviour," she fumed, her hands balled in to<br>tight fists, as she paced back and forth. She had felt angry at him many times  
>before, but never this bad. She actually felt the urge to throw a punch at him,<br>let alone send a hex his way.

"I care not for what that idiotic child thinks. I will also  
>not have you mother him in my classroom. If he cannot follow simple<br>instructions then he deserves to be treated like the imbecile he is!" Snape  
>spat, his own temper flaring.<p>

"Some students need extra help Severus. Not everyone is as  
>naturally talented as you seem to think you are. Neville is here to learn, not<br>to be ridiculed. I also did not deserve to be ridiculed. I only came to pass on  
>a message from the headmaster, but I will not ignore bullying when I am witness<br>to it." She prodded her finger in to his chest. "I think I will be returning a  
>message to the headmaster myself."<p>

"HE IS INCAPABLE OF LEARNING!" he yelled at her, which made  
>her jump back and put both hands to her ears. "You distinctly heard me tell<br>Longbottom to slice the Cinnaweed beans diagonally, not vertically!"

"There is no need to raise your voice! I'm standing three  
>feet away from you!" She rubbed her ears. She was starting to get a headache.<br>"Anyway, does it really make that much of a difference whichever way Cinnaweed  
>Beans are cut?"<p>

His dark eyes bored into hers, and he snarled, "You really  
>have no idea how stupid you sound do you? For obviously reasons, your<br>incompetence with a cauldron, you were not appointed the position of Potions  
>Master."<p>

"Severus," she warned as she glared back at him. "Do not  
>push me! I have tolerated your mood swings for several years, but there is only<br>so much one woman can endure."

"Aurora, cutting a Cinnaweed Bean the incorrectly could have  
>a dangerous result to the finished potion." He let out a cruel laugh. "Perhaps<br>I should have made Longbottom test his mixture in front of the other students."

"Humiliating a young child? What kind of man does that  
>Severus? I thought I was actually getting to know the real Severus Snape, but I<br>was wrong." She had given this man so many chances, and she thought she was  
>finally getting somewhere with him. She had become quite fond of him, so much<br>that she made up daft excuses to bump in to him, such as the nonexistent  
>message from the headmaster.<p>

He didn't answer her straightaway, but instead walked over  
>to his desk, sat down in his chair and began opening drawers. His greasy black<br>hair trailed across his lesson plan whilst he searched.

"Do not think you can analyse me like those stars you peer  
>at through your telescope. I imagine you have spent too many nights gazing up<br>at the sky. You have become blinded by the moonlight, and you can't see that  
>those children take advantage of your kindness."<p>

She frowned, her brow wrinkled but her temper was slowing  
>calming to a simmer. Was that an insult or a compliment?<p>

"Perhaps I am a little too kind sometimes, and don't always  
>say what is on my mind-for good reason. I do not like to hurt other people's<br>feelings. I have accepted that you are who you are Severus Snape, and I know  
>now there is no changing that. Many times you have voiced your opinion of me,<br>even made comments about my skill at duelling, and I have simply smiled and  
>agreed that perhaps you were right. This time, however, you are wrong and I can<br>stand it no longer."

Snape had found what he was looking for and sat back in the  
>chair, giving her his full attention, clasping the item in his right hand. He swept his greasy hair from his face with<br>his left hand, his black eyes taking in her tired expression.

"When the time comes and you are face to face with a death  
>Eater, you will be thankful that I bothered to give you Duelling advice," he<br>pushed back the chair and stood up.

She looked up at his face then let her eyes fall to his  
>chest, waist, feet and then back up to his face. "Oh, I think I could handle a<br>Death Eater just fine without your advice. Thank you," she snorted a laugh, "and  
>on that note, I'm leaving."<p>

"Wait!" he said, putting  
>his left hand on the desk. She turned<br>back to face him, a look of impatient on her face.

"Yes?" she said sounding bored.

"You asked me what kind of man acts the way I do, and the  
>answer is... the kind of man who is aware that pleasantries are wasted of many<br>undeserving recipients. You, however, are an exception and I admit that I take  
>some gratification from our conversations".<p>

Sinistra just stared, unblinking, at him. Her hand moved up  
>to her cheek as if she'd been slapped hard.<p>

"I have something for you", Snape said, "it's not to my  
>taste, but I've been meaning to give it to you for a while. I think you will<br>like it." He opened his right hand to reveal a small blue velvet box. He pushed  
>it a little too hastily across the desk, and it toppled over the edge and fell<br>to the floor.

Sinistra looked down at the object as it hit the floor and  
>she caught a glimpse of shiny metal. Her mouth dropped open in horror. No...<br>Surely not, she thought. What was going through the man's mind?

Severus had virtually dived over the desk, knocking  
>parchment askew and an ink pot over-which stained the wood a dark shade of<br>purple, to catch the little velvet box as it bounced a second time and  
>discarded its contents across the hard tiles. On his hands and knees he reached<br>out and caught it, before it almost slid under a dusty bookcase. He looked  
>dishevelled and out of breath, but there was flash of triumph across his face<br>for a very short moment.

He swivelled round, still on his knees, to face her holding  
>out the glinting metal to her. "Is it to your taste?" he asked, still panting<br>from the ordeal. His dark eyes searching her face for her answer.

"Severus. What do you mean by this?" There was a tremble to  
>her voice. She put her right hand to her chest feeling the rapid beat of her<br>heart behind her left breast. None of this made any sense. Was she dreaming?  
>Had they not been arguing moments before?<p>

The ring was still pinched between his finger and thumb, on  
>his right hand. "Isn't it obvious? Surely you are aware that I have... certain<br>feelings-"

"No," she cut him off. She started backing away towards the  
>door. "Is this your idea of romance Severus? You tell me you have feelings for<br>me after you insult me! I am tired of your constant mood swings; you are  
>wearing me out and... I must go. I was wrong to seek you out this afternoon".<p>

He rose to his feet, brushing dust from his robes, with a  
>scowl on his face. He glared at her, obviously offended at her refusal of his<br>offer. "And these are your final words?" he said through gritted teeth.

"Yes. I was foolish to think this could ever work. Mother  
>was right; I should have given Ronan's offer more consideration." Her eyes<br>began to well up with tears. "Perhaps there is still time. He hasn't yet left  
>for Bulgaria."<p>

Red eyed she hurried of out of his dungeon, slamming the  
>door shut behind her. "What an Insufferable man!" She heard a loud smash as<br>several jars of preserved animals fell from their shelves. She felt a moment of  
>guilt, but shrugged it off. They could be replaced.<p>

She moved quickly through the dimly lit hall and ran down  
>the large staircase. She reached the large entrance doorway. With a wave of her<br>wand the locking mechanism creaked and clunked and the bolts retreated in to  
>the stone walls. She leaned her weight on the heavy doors until the gap was big<br>enough for her to squeeze through. She heard Snape calling her name, just as  
>she slipped out in to the night. He was going to alert the entire castle, and<br>her business was something she did not want whispered about the school.

She wished she owned an Invisibility cloak so she could  
>hide, just for a while so she could get her head straight. What an awful<br>afternoon and now evening this was turning out to be.

"Leave me alone Severus. I will Hex you!" She didn't slow  
>down as she crossed the school grounds. The grass was wet and muddy in places,<br>and her shoes were already soaked through. She pulled her robes around her for  
>warmth, wishing she was in her quarters near the fireplace.<p>

Hearing his quick squelchy footsteps, she glanced behind  
>her. She took her wand from her pocket and fired a Hex that just missed him;<br>the red sparks lit up his face and made him look quite menancing.

"I'm w-warning you Severus! The next one won't miss," she  
>stuttered. But instead of firing another Hex at him, she changed direction and<br>headed towards the Forbidden Forest. She could hide in the thick foliage, or  
>behind a tree.<p>

"Don't be foolish Aurora. There are unthinkable dangers in  
>the forest, despicable creatures you could not even imagine."<p>

She ignored his warning and ran straight in to the forest,  
>and didn't stop until he grabbed her wrist and jerked her back towards him. She<br>bumped into his chest and he held her tight.

"You have acted so foolishly," he panted. It seemed he was  
>the less fitter of the two. He looked down his overly large nose at her."You<br>could have been seriously injured, or worse!"

"Let me go Severus!" she said sounding exhausted. She gazed  
>at his strong hand still holding onto her arm. "You are hurting me."<p>

"I will not! Not until you see sense!" he demanded, not releasing  
>his hold on her, looking for any sign of forgiveness in her face. He was<br>panting heavily. "Stop this insanity. Ronan Kraktov is not worthy of your  
>attention. He is nothing but an imbecile with muscles!" He grabbed both of her<br>wrists this time and pulled her towards his body.

"Severus, get away from me!" She struggled free of his hold  
>and raised her wand. She shot another Hex at him, this time intending to stun<br>him.

He was quicker and disarmed her by shouting, "Expelliarmus!"  
>Her wand flew out of her hand and in to his empty left hand. He pocketed it<br>with a sly grin on his face. She gasped in shock, and took a few paces back.

Snape opened his  
>mouth to speak but before he had time to form the words a sound of galloping<br>hooves distracted him. Bushes shook from the thudding vibration. The beast leapt  
>from the darkness, raised itself up on its hind legs and pounded its front<br>hooves in to Snape's chest, knocking him to the ground. Aurora stood shocked,  
>hands raised to her mouth, unable to move.<p>

Snape's face twisted with the pain, but fury showed in his  
>eyes. Still holding his wand he flicked a Hex at the magical creature, green<br>spiralled bolts of lightning shot out but went wide in to the forest. The  
>centaur, half man half horse, raised its front legs again.<p>

"A creature so pure of heart must be shown kindness," it  
>said in a polite voice. "I cannot allow you to harm her; you must learn the<br>consequences of such hostility." With lightning speed the centaur raised his  
>bow, pulled the bowstring taut and then released two projectiles. There was a<br>whooshing sound and then a very loud crack.

Then the Centaur nodded towards Aurora and galloped off in  
>to the night. Aurora was shocked. It all happened so fast... the incident in<br>the classroom, the arguing, the blue velvet box, leaving the castle and now...

Saliva sprayed from Severus' lips as he hissed in agony. His  
>leg burned like someone had poured molten lava over it. Every attempt at<br>freeing himself caused the broken bones to crunch and grind against each other.

Just below his right knee, two wooden arrows protruded out  
>of his flesh. He was pinned to the ground. Blood oozed out of the wounds,<br>saturating his trouser leg and pooling on the hard cold floor around him.

"Oh Merlin! Oh Merlin!" she muttered as she  
>instinctively put her hand to his leg to apply pressure to the wound. That's<br>what they always did in Muggle movies, she thought; apply pressure to stop the  
>bleeding.<p>

"Ssssssssss!" he hissed through clenched teeth,  
>sounding very much like a snake. Her touch had intensified the pain. "What are<br>you doing? Remove your hand!"

She couldn't bear to see him in so much pain, it was a side  
>to him she hadn't seen before, so weak and so human. Somehow Snape was<br>controlling his urge to scream, and she knew if the roles were reversed Snape  
>would have had to use a silencing charm on her<p>

She put her other hand to his face, cupping his cheek.  
>"It's going to be ok." She pressed her lips gently to his, her face wet<br>with tears. This seemed to calm him and his heavy panting slowed. "I need to  
>stop the bleeding. I know it hurts, and I'm sorry."<p>

This was all her fault. If she hadn't stormed off into the  
>Forbidden Forest over a silly tiff... Severus wouldn't have followed her...<p>

She wasn't totally to blame. Severus was... Severus was...  
>he was bleeding to death! She had to stop thinking about who was to blame for<br>yet another ridiculous spat between the pair of them. She had to get him back  
>to the castle, to the hospital wing where Madam Pomfrey would heal him.<p>

There was only one thing for it...the arrows would have to  
>come out. Severus, who was looking extremely pale, tried to speak but couldn't<br>form the words. Using her fingers she brushed his long dark hair, damp with  
>sweat, out of his face.<p>

"Shush," she said. "Don't speak, you need your energy, and  
>you need to keep still too. No! Don't go to sleep, stay awake for me."<p>

She had to do it now. "I'm sorry Severus!" Then, there was a  
>loud snap and then another and an even louder scream that came deep from within<br>Severus' lungs. A whooshing, fluttering sound filled the air and a hundred or  
>so small airborne creatures fled the forest in fright. She had broken the arrow<br>shafts, so although parts of the arrows were still sticking out of his leg, he  
>was no longer bolted to the floor.<p>

Severus reached for a strand of her hair and managed a,  
>"Thank you," before passing out from exhaustion.<p>

She took out her wand and sent up a flare, a bright red  
>firework that crackled above the treetops, to alert the castle of their<br>whereabouts.

She didn't have to wait long for help to arrive. Within  
>minutes she heard heavy footfalls, that shook the ground beneath her, which<br>could only belong to-

"Rubeus!" she yelled, "we're over here!"

The huge man, Rubeus Hagrid, the school Grounds Man bound over  
>to her. If she hadn't know what a kind hearted, if a little daft, man he was<br>then she would have been terrified at the sheer size of him. He loomed over  
>her, and his hands were the size of dishes.<p>

"Hello Aurora. Nice night for a stroll in the forest!" he  
>said glancing around, "you've gotta be careful in 'ere. You don' know what<br>might be lurking roun' the next tree."

"It wasn't really a stroll-"

"It were Fang my Boarhoun', the great ruddy coward, who  
>alerted me that somethin' was wrong. He was whimperin' at the window, an'<br>that's when I noticed the sky was lit up red."

Aurora noticed that the blood around the broken arrow shafts  
>in Severus' leg was starting to hiss and bubble. The arrows must have been<br>laced with a poison or maybe they carried an awful curse. They needed to get  
>Severus to a Medi-Wizard quickly, but Hagrid had made no move to help.<p>

"He needs help Hagrid, please," Aurora asked. Her hand  
>resting on Severus' torso, feeling the slow rise and fall of his chest as his<br>condition worsened.

"Oh, right... I almost forgot about him. Stand back!" Aurora  
>stepped back as Hargrid stooped down and lifted the injured man, who let out a<br>groan but remained unconscious. "Let's get him to the castle. Madam Pomfrey  
>will sort him out, an' he'll be right as rain by the mornin'."<p>

Severus' head repeatedly bobbed against Hagrid's large  
>shoulder as the latter man carried him up to the castle.<p>

A headache would be the least of his troubles in the  
>morning.<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

Thank you for the reviews I received for Chapter 1. Brilliant ideas Trineum, keep them coming and I hope you like this 2nd chapter :)

I've made a few amendments and decided to write some prequal chapters that lead up to Chapter 1. Please review! All ideas and suggestions welcome :)

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><p>Aurora Sinistra pulled her robes tightly around her. It was a cold night, and the icy wind sent a chill to her bones. She couldn't sleep so she had taken her telescope to the castle roof and spent the twilight hours alone with the stars. The view before her eyes was so beautiful that she felt almost hypnotised, drawn towards twinkling stars and distant planets like a sailor to a siren.<p>

She imagined being able to travel to the worlds she gazed upon, perhaps with a wedding band on her finger and Ronon's arm around her waist. Her mother loved Ronon. To her mother he was already her son-in-law. Everything was always Ronon this and Ronon that, and she was no longer sure which feelings were her own and which belonged to her mother. She loved mother, but at times she wished she wouldn't interfere in her love life so much. She could be so infuriating and relentless.

She sighed. Was that really the life she wanted? She couldn't answer Ronon when he asked for her hand three months ago and she couldn't now. He was Bulgarian and great warrior amongst his people. His father had trained him at a young age to fight with his fists. Ronan studied hard, learned the art of Anoch Darsk and entered in to fighting tournaments. Aurora had seen the many trophies and belts Ronan had won. Ronan was undefeated. He fought like a champion and if the trophies weren't enough to prove that, then the scars across his rippling muscles was. The battle scars covering his chest was almost like reading a constellation of stars.

All she wanted to do that night was to be alone and even that wasn't going as planned. Mrs Norris, the caretaker's cat, had appeared and was curling round her legs.

Aurora walked towards the doorway quickly to see if she had any other visitors, or if anyone was lurking about in the shadows. When no one else appeared she turned her attention back to the cat and scooped her up in her arms. The cat purred and stretched her neck up to give Aurora an affectionate head-butt.

"Thank you," Aurora said and smiled as she walked, the cat still in her arms, back over to her telescope. As she stroked the cat's neck a flicker of light caught her eye. Her eyes searched the school grounds and the surrounding area and then she saw it again. It was a very small light, the glow of a wand tip moving through the trees. Someone was in the Forbidden Forest, most likely someone who was up to no good. Maybe it was Filch simply looking for Mrs Norris.

She frowned. There were strict rules, and entry in to the forest was prohibited. Even teachers were warned against entering the forest, but that never stopped them. It's well known that Professor Agnes Tishall once got lost for two whole weeks. When they eventually found her, she was half starving and muttering incomprehensible nonsense over and over. She was never the same again. Apparently she was looking for a very rare herb to make tea with, but no one will ever know the name of it as she refuses to speak of it. A short time after the incident she handed in her notice and a new teacher, Professor Sprout, was appointed as the new Herbology Teacher.

The Forbidden Forest was a very dangerous place, and Aurora couldn't for the life of her understand why it was located so close to the school grounds. She found it odd that such a dangerous place existed at all. As a child she had once ventured in to the forest. It was an experience that haunts her to this day. An innocent game of Wizard Hide-And-Seek turned in to a three hour nightmare. She got lost in the woods, running in circles until she was rescued by the groundskeeper. She was covered in filth and found sleeping under the rotting remains of a fallen tree. She shuddered at the memory and made a mental note to never be so stupid ever again.

So who would be wandering about in the forest at this hour she thought, and then the sound of someone clearing their throat made her almost jump out of her skin.

"Excuse me for the interruption Professor, but might I have my cat back?"

It was Argus Filch the school caretaker. His face was haggard and he looked worn from many years of yelling at students. Aurora managed to compose herself. She smiled and rubbed the cat's ear.

"Mrs Norris often keeps me company late at night when I cannot sleep. I welcome her visits," she said.

Filch eyed her cautiously for a moment before saying, "She's a good creature. Never done any harm, apart from ridding the castle of unwanted pests. She keeps a close eye on those students, reports back she does when there's trouble".

Aurora smiled and lowered the cat to the ground, who skipped contentedly towards her master. "All children get up to mischief. It's lucky the Hogwarts students have you and Mrs Norris to keep them inline."

Filch wasn't sure if he was being mocked, but he nodded a thank you to her. He picked his cat up and hugged her tightly to his body. He then left and Aurora was once again alone.

She turned back to look for the flicker of wand light she'd seen earlier but it was gone. She searched the trees a moment longer, but the light didn't reappear. It might have been a mischievous student wandering about after hours. Whoever it was, she hoped that whatever darkness lurked in the forest had left them well alone.

She bid the moon good night, packed up her telescope and went to her chambers to store it away safely.

Still feeling wide-awake she thought getting a hot chocolate from the kitchens might be a good idea, and so left her room and headed down stairs. A drop of fire whiskey in her hot chocolate might be just what she needed.

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><p>Severus Snape hurried down the dark passageway, the sound of his footsteps echoed off the walls. His skin was as pale as the moonlight and facial expression was like marble. He looked as cold and as hard as the floor he was walking on. He could have a passed for a vampire.<p>

A sound came from his left and as quick as lightning he flicked out his wand, "Lumos." The tiny light produced at the end of his wand lit up the passageway and showed that it was empty. There was no one there except for him and a few portraits of important figures from wizarding history. One of whom was Falcon Gyros, who was currently snoozing away in his picture frame.

Falcon Gyros was a Wizard who once taught an Animagus class at Hogwarts. He was famed for his dealings with Alchemy and his theory on the law of equivalent exchange. Unfortunately his eagerness to impress and idiocy had been his downfall. During a class fieldtrip he managed to transmute his own arms in to a pair of feathery wings. The students applauded while he flapped about for their amusement. In his excitement at his success, and the encouragement of several Slytherin students he launched himself off the cliff and rather quickly met his death. Many students had to endure heavy amounts of counselling and spent a period of time at St Mungos. Since that day all successful Animagus transformations needed to be registered with the Ministry of Magic to ensure there were no further incidents.

"Incompetent fool," Snape said and marched off. He wasn't a fan of fame seekers or those who brought attention to themselves by doing idiotic things. He didn't intend to ever have his personal life splashed across the front page of The Quibbler, so he always kept a low profile.

He was in a very bad mood tonight. He was cold, and damp, and his robes were soaked at the hem from dragging along the wet grass. His socks made a squelchy noise each time he stepped and it felt like something slimy had crawled into his left shoe.

Earlier that night, Argus Filch the school Caretaker had knocked on his dungeon door to report a group of students who were planning to take a trip in to the Forbidden forest. Filch said he had heard that the Weasley twins had discovered a way of moving about the castle undetected. Filch wasn't sure by what method, but he told Snape that they had chosen the forest as their midnight expedition.

It was a fool's errand. Snape had gone in to the forest as requested by Filch, but saw no sign of any students. Instead he was met with creaking branches, snapping twigs, and scurrying creatures. There were very few things that Snape feared, but he was slightly unnerved by the eeriness of the forest at night.

He spent over an hour searching for any sign of the alleged students, and had resigned to the fact that it was a hoax. The Weasley twins would be punished. A month in detention should wipe the smirks off their faces! He would not allow anyone to make a mockery of him.

He was so enraged that as he turned a corner he didn't see Aurora Sinistra who he bumped into and sent flying across the floor. His temper eased off as he bent to help her up, but not enough to stop him saying, "You should watch where you are going!"

She brushed dust from her robes and looked at him annoyed. "Thank you for that Severus. That was just what I needed to cure my insomnia. A concussion!"

Severus narrowed his eyes at her. "Has it not occurred to you to use wand light when moving about the castle at night? Had I been an intruder, you may very well have taken your last breath tonight."

"I could ask you what business you had loitering about at such a late hour, but I don't have the energy for your answer." She rubbed the back of her skull, and winced at the pain, where a small bump had formed.

He moved towards her, his hand reaching out to touch her skin. "Let me see your injury. I may have a suitable ointment in my chambers." His tone was steely. It was a command and not a request.

She flinched to avoid his touch and took a step backwards, increasing the distance between them. "It's fine. It's just a bump. I'm fine and I doubt any ointment of yours would help."

Severus pulled his hand back. He looked hurt, but then anger flashed across his face. "As you wish." He studied her expression and when he was satisfied she was telling the truth about being fine he walked away.

"Wait!" she called to him feeling a pang of guilt for dismissing him so quickly, "wait a moment please," and then stared at his back as he came to an abrupt holt. She noticed bits of twigs and pine needles were embedded in the fibres of his robes. Speaking rudely to people wasn't something she did often, but Snape brought that characteristic out in her.

"Sev," she cleared her throat, "Severus." He didn't turn around. "Forgive my brashness, I'm tired and I am grateful for your concern". He turned to face her, eyeing her suspiciously just as Argus Filch had. What was it that caused the men in the castle to doubt her sincerity she thought. "Severus, before we literally bumped in to one another a moment ago, I was on my way to the kitchen for a hot chocolate. I had hoped it would help me sleep. You may join me if you like."

Snape hesitated, "I don't care for such things, however, I will escort you." He signalled with his hand for her to start walking and she complied.

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><p>Thank you for reading. Please review! Reviews encourage me to write the next chapter quicker :)<p> 


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